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Rejection is unavoidable in life.  It sucks, but it happens.  Being told no is awkward for both parties involved.  No one likes rejection.  You do have to deal with it, though.  The way you handle dismissal says a lot about your character.  Usually, if you’re upset, the best thing to say is nothing at all.  Recently, I dealt with a boy that could’ve taken a refresher course on that lesson.

I’ll tell you honestly what happened.  We went on one date.  He paid for our dinner and I paid for the movie.  We texted quite frequently afterward.  However, his opinions didn’t seem to match up with mine.  After being repulsed a few too many times by what he said, I decided to break things off.  We were not dating, but I wanted him to know I would not continue to text him.  He reacted violently.

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Read it a few times.  Let those foul words sink in deep.  I was shocked and stung but mostly scared.  I instantly blocked him on all forms of social media.  I hadn’t done anything wrong!  I shouldn’t be worried if he would find out where I live or how to contact me again or if he would go after my parents.  I simply told a boy no.

Prior to the abusive messages, he asked “Why’d you lead me along?”  Let’s take a second and think about what that means.  Where was I leading him?  I hadn’t left a trail of breadcrumbs leading up my skirt.  Did he think he’d one day await me at the end of the aisle?  This phrase is very dangerous.  It implies that if I give someone my attention at one time, they will always have access to me.  I do not owe my affection or my body to anyone.  I can decline an offer at any time.  My yes can always be replaced with a no.  Consent is a gift.  Consent is fluid and tentative.  No one has the right to bash you for the decisions you make.  Never be afraid to say no.

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Message Sent.